The Walk

For those of you who are unaware, I've always been a huge MMA fan. There's just something about pitting two people against one another, in a steel cage, and having them slug it out for an extended period of time. I also like the fact that it's a single man sport. Basically, what I'm trying to say here is, there's pretty much no excuse for losing. If you lose, that's on you and only you. In other sports such as football or baseball, you have a whole team to blame. A couple people can screw something up for the whole team and in turn, that makes all of them look bad. However, in MMA, the pressure is all on you. It's a single man sport and that's just something that has always fascinated me.

There's honestly nothing better than inviting a couple of friends over into your man cave, watching some fights and sipping on some age appropriate drinks. I myself, usually just watch the fights by myself because I'm kind of a loser and have negative two friends but it's still a good time, I swear. This past weekend I decided to try and enter the mind of a fighter. I tried to think how they thought about things. Most notably their opening walkout into the arena on fight night. It's almost as if you're a modern day gladiator, entering the Colosseum and walking into battle. In my humble opinion, there's nothing more exciting to watch.

Like I said, I wrote this poem based off of what a fighter was most likely thinking about during his/her walk to the cage. It wasn't nearly as difficult as I thought it would be either. It's mainly due to the fact that I'm probably such a huge fan and I literally have seen at least a thousand fighter walkouts in my day. At last, the time has come. Sit back, relax and prepare to be mind screwed... Yes, I know what you're all thinking but I can't say the other word. However, I will say it rhymes with ducked. Here's this weeks poem, enjoy.

   “The Walk”

It's your time,

Your time to shine,

All of the nerves,

All of the tears,

All of the hard work,

It all comes down to this,

Seize the moment,

It's your time,

Your time to shine,

So you'll make that walk,

Knowing there's two roads ahead,

The road to failure,

The road to success,

You've got to make that choice,

You can choose to fail,

Or you can choose to succeed,

It all comes down to this,

So you'll make that walk,

Not knowing what will happen,

But you'll give it your all every time,

That's what it's all about.

The One

It's seven in the morning and I'm already regretting writing this blog post at the last minute. For real, I need to start writing these on like a Sunday afternoon or something because, this is honestly just getting out of hand. On a real though, writing this weeks poem came rather easy to me. Maybe that's a good thing because, my brain usually doesn't function properly until 9 or 10 o clock. I've always kind of been that guy who's wondered what will my future be like. What will become of my relationship status five or ten years from now? I came to realize that I shouldn't worry about such things. Usually things such as this will not necessarily work themselves out but they will happen eventually. I just have to keep being aware of my surroundings. I just have to keep doing my own thing right now. I need to focus on my schooling, finding a job I don't hate, and keeping up my image. Sorry, I had to slip that last one in there.

I've always believed that there is someone for almost everyone. Now, I say almost because, honestly some people just aren't meant to be in a serious relationship. By that I mean, they're either bat shit crazy or they look similar to a potato. In the back of my mind, I've always kind of thought that when you're in a relationship with someone, you're either going to break up with that person or stay together and one day hopefully get married. It's a sad thing to think but that's the reality of relationships nowadays. 

I titled this poem "The One" for obvious reasons. I wrote about how once in your life you encounter someone who'll may your wildest dreams come true and no it's not Pedro from Napoleon Dynamite. More importantly though, I wrote this poem in the hope that one day, I'll meet someone who will not only accept me for me but can also actually tolerate my sarcastic self. This weeks poem is definitely in my top five favorite that I've written. I hope you like it y'all.

                            “The One”

I truly believe,

Once in your life,

You find someone that can completely turn your life around,

You tell of hopes for the future,

Dreams that will never come to fruition,

Goals that will never be reached,

All of the constant disappointments life throws at you,

You need not worry about what they’ll think of you because they love you,

For whom you are,

The only thing you’re worried about,

Is letting them walk out of your life,

Forever,

In the back of your mind,

You’re wondering if such a wonderful thing could happen twice,

You’re wondering if there’s actually a person that can lighten up your whole world,

As much as this person does now,

But the one thing that keeps you going,

Is knowing that,

They’re yours,

Knowing they’re part of your life,

Right here,

Right now.                        

Distant Memory

Lately, I have been thinking a lot about my past. More specifically, my most recent ex-girlfriend. The main reason for this or at least I think the main reason I have been thinking about her so much lately can mainly be attributed to the fact that her and I have a lot of unfinished business. Our relationship ended so abruptly that I just couldn't really process what was really going on at the time. As soon as I received the text on that dreadful day, my heart just sank. It was as if my whole body went numb. Someone could have literally punched me in the face and I would have welcomed it. At least when you're getting punched in the face you're semi prepared for how painful it's going to be. Well, unless you're getting punched by a prime Mike Tyson. Then you're pretty much screwed. To numb the pain, I did what any guy would do in my situation. I simply ignored it as a whole. Now that in itself, just created another barrier within myself. One way or another, you're going to have to face the problem eventually. One day, you have to realize that it's over and at that time, I just wasn't ready to confront that awful reality.

It's been almost a year since my ex and I have broken up but the wounds still seem fresh. You'd think time would start to do its thing and start healing some wounds. I guess, I'll just have to wait a bit longer for that to occur. One thing, I felt that I could do to really try and get at least a little bit of closure to the situation was to drown myself in poetry. I needed to find a way to revisit what I felt that day, capture how serious the situation actually was, and finally put an end to that chapter in my life. In my heart, I knew it was way past due in getting over my ex but that's what happens when you simply don't deal with the problem up front. Usually, I just ignore it until it goes away and I really need to stop doing that. In recent years though, it has almost become a way of life for me. I'm actually a super chill guy. I joke around probably 90 percent of the time and I try not to take life too seriously. Maybe that's been my problem all along. Maybe just maybe, I need to start confronting the reality that ignoring your problems is not the best way of resolving them.

The poem that I've written is in fact one of my personal favorites. It took me about two hours to write. The only reason it took so long was because, I kept on goofing off. I like to think of myself as being an above average multitasker but in reality I actually suck. Yes, you heard it from the horses mouth. Sometimes even I tend to take on more than I can actually handle. Some of those things that kept me from finishing this poem sooner were trying to actually write the poem, eating, surfing social media, and even texting my buddy that I couldn't come to his party and get "Turnt" because I was stuck inside writing poetry. After which he replied with a full paragraph containing nothing but 

crying with laughter emoji's. Anyways, here's my poem. Hope you appreciate it as much as I do. 

            

                       “Distant Memory”

I loved you once,
But now it seems you’re nothing,
Nothing more than a distant memory,
In time,
You’ll slip into the back of my mind,
Until the day I think back,
And wonder what it would be like,
If only for a second,
To see your face once more,
I remember those lips,
That crooked smile,
Those brown eyes,
I've seen none other, 
But thinking back,
Is all I’ll ever be able to do,
You’re nothing more than a distant memory,
And that’s all you’ll ever be.

It's Not Over

For this weeks poem, I decided to change things up a little bit. I know that I'm usually funny and what not but this particular topic is most certainly no joke. Far from it as a matter of fact. The issue that I'm going to be talking about is depression and how it effects our everyday lives. I wanted to first start off by saying that to any of you suffering from any sort of depression, that I'm here for you. Seriously, if you ever need someone to talk to just hit me up. I'd be more than happy to help. As someone who has suffered in the past from depression, I can certainly identify with most. I also know how difficult it is to live in silence along with that constant struggle swelling up inside of you. That feeling of just utter loneliness. Not that long ago, when a series of short lived flings went sour back to back for me, I sank into a deep depression. I felt as if life was a joke and I was the only one not in on the gag. What was wrong with me? Time and time again, I found myself asking that very same question. I came to realize that I was my own worst enemy. Depression can destroy you from the inside but only if you let it.

Knowing that I was cast with a huge challenge in writing a poem that fully captured the magnitude of how serious this illness really is, I pondered for quite a long time. It was so long that it seemed I might not ever start this poem. I almost decided to switch topics. After hours of thinking, my stroke of genius finally hit and I started writing the poem. I knew in my heart that I needed to make this poem count. I had to return myself to that place in my life where I absolutely had no will to do anything. Looking back though, I wouldn't trade my life that I have now for anything. If depression had never entered my life, I would not be where I am today. I wouldn't have the friends and the relationship with my family that I have now. Everything that has happened to me in the past has happened for a reason. Knowing what I know now, I wouldn't change a thing. I mean, if I can overcome depression, what else can really phase me now? I know that I've kept you waiting long enough so this week's poem is below. Hopefully you appreciate it because, it took me forever to write.

                                      “It’s Not Over”

Loneliness is only temporary,

                        You aren't your own best friend,

                        Whether you know it or not,

                        People do care,                                                

                        It’s not over,

                        You’re worth more than you think,

                        Don’t let the sadness overtake you,

                        Reach out,

                        You are your own worst enemy,

                        That much is clear,

                        But you have to fight it,

                        It’s not over,

                        Live your life,

                        Believe me when I say,

                        It gets better,

                        Dig deep and hold on,

You’re not alone,

                        It’s not over,

                        Not yet,

                        Not yet.